I always knew that I was blessed and taken care of by light beings. A guardian angel was always by my side. I felt that many times!
I accepted my divine protection in childhood and had fun knowing it there. It was part of my identity, part of my little life. An angel’s blessing encompassed my aura, keeping me safe and guiding me to make the best choices. I trusted that bond. I put in it all my faith because, for no logical reason, I knew is right for me. Then, when I needed it most, it was there; my guiding light, my trusted adviser, my safety in this realm, my inner connection, my intuition, my eternal divine gift.
Later in life, I wanted to feel in control. I wanted to be independent. That thrive for „freedom,” that need to be accountable for my life, for explaining logically everything that ever happened to me, made me to question and ultimately reject the connection. Some moments and reactions defy everything logically. My philosophy to explain those moments was, „I can’t explain; therefore, I ignore.” And ignorance, even though I knew there was something else behind the obvious, made me doubt. Doubt turned into fear, taking the safety feeling away from me.
Mayday, mayday! Anyone there?
Losing safety and being surrounded by fear, I got to live in a cold place of my being, where I „controlled” my life. But everything was frozen, and red lights warned me at every corner. I was unsure and doubted every choice, worried about every move; my steps were smaller and smaller, trembling and shaking. The fear that I might see, hear or feel something „illogic” became my nightmare. I comforted myself to cope with bad dreams:” I „control” all these steady steps.”
Mayday, mayday! If I see a light dragon coming to rescue me and wanting to take me to a dreamland, I live a fairy tale life. What should I do or say?
„Sorry, dragons no longer exist! I can’t control nor explain your existence, so thanks, but you may go now! I will make my next move ” brave” enough, and it will take me 25 cm further to my dream. Goodbye now! ” and continue to myself: „What a weird imagination. A light dragon… This can be a good subject for a fantasy book! Hah, girl, you are so funny with your creative mind images!”
And I’d come back to my scary realm, thinking I just imagined light dragons, unicorns, and fairies, and I’d conclude that none of these existed.
But when I needed it most, when I was ready to surrender, when I believed with all my heart that just a miracle could change my status quo, and when I asked for a divine gift or sign, my wing was always there. Then, out of nowhere, resources appeared, and people and ideas came to save me from my frozen red-lighted nightmare. Then, and only then, it felt like riding light dragons; it tasted like freedom, smelled like courage, and empowered me to feel I was the queen of my world. Then set me free of the imagined need for control and the need to explain myself to others.
I can now live FREE to be!
What would you do or say if you would see a light dragon, a fairy, or a unicorn?
Stay safe!
M.
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